Unlock.

As I create my network of destructive signals,
I wonder why I choose to engage in the activities that I do.
And why it is these things, that pull me out of bordem and into my active state.
Why is my mind fashioned the way it is?

My entire life, it has done nothing but defer me from accomplishing the goals that so many other people choose to aspire to. But somehow I think this is what makes me different from them.
My parents, for a long time couldn't cope with the fact that I would constantly have a desire to learn about technology and mechanics. My friends couldn't either. But yet, I was still told for the longest time that I was 'special' and 'different'. I cannot tell you how many times I've heard the phrase 'Is capable of so much more' said, in refrence to my school grades. I never really gave them the time of day. I did just above the minimal amount of work needed to shut them the hell up. The entire time, I would constantly have my head in front of two things. A book, or a piece of technology. My room was littered with the shells of broken phones, computers, copiers, printers, stereos, wires, T.Vs and more. I've been an insomniac for the best portion of my life. And that plague lives on. Reason being, is that an important requirement for me to sleep is that I need to have quelled the need for creation. Basically, accomplish everything I wanted to in the given day. And I've never really been able to do that. I know that once I sleep, I'll loose the vigor I have toward my project. I know sleep is an enemy, that I have no way of fighting against.