chimera

chimera

the mind runs circles around itself
in this place
in this time

i cannot access the words to describe
the wonder of this anonymous world
of shapes and colors,
and interpretations of perceptions

falling into thoughts about thoughts
imagery paths and self-induced hallucinations
i couldn't tell you the length of it all
not even in a million words

you could wish to think it was true
and hope to believe that it would,
as much as you want
but in the end
in the very end
it will never be real.

lionize

lionize

you are amazing
astound me with every step
with every word
with every letter

my eyes get lost in yours
my world would collapse without
you

and yet there is so much mystery
behind those beautiful eyes
i want to explore you

and yet i can't bring myself to move
frozen in this limbo
in ecstasy

until you finally deem me worthy
and wake me
with your soft lips
and incredible eyes.

Tired

tired

i'm so tired
so tired of your insecurities
of your leeches sucking the life from me

i'm so tired
of our memories haunting me
all of them i wish i could relinquish
but can't

but won't

i'm so tired of the mudstains you leave in my car
right after it was finally clean

i'm so tired of the way that you can't see through me
that you never could
and never will

i'm so impossibly tired of how i'll never escape
this infinite loop of feelings

no matter what i do.
i do.
i don't.

Peel the tape off my eyelids
I think the brainwashing is complete
All I have plastered across my brain
Are pictures of you

All with running ink
Impossible to forget
How the sun shines off your face
How your hair tickled my cheek

I think the brainwashing is complete
Because the only word I can muster
Is your name

And I utter it in pure ecstasy, forevermore.

Rocket Through Paper

I've been hiding behind the posters of your face
That litter the walls of my mind
I've been hiding from my impending doom

Soaring at me from afar
Protect me, oh please

I can't protect my self
From charred skin and shattered bones

These paper thin posters can't save me anymore
Life's assault threatens my every breath
Protect me, oh please

Protect me, Save me, oh please, oh please

Wake me

I've been too busy dying all the time,
To really appreciate the importance in life
The caffeine hangovers and serotonin hangups

Save me from the infernal machine
Wake me

I've been too busy sleeping all the time,
But my eyes are glued open
Red and dry, their pain is haunting

Save me from this demonic contraption
Wake me up

I've been too busy living all the time,
To die underneath a purple sky
Oh how beautiful that sunset was

Save me
Wake me

what a beautiful person.
did you see them?
beautiful.
did you see what they did?
amazing.
did you see how they did it?
elegant.
did you listen to them speak?
eloquent.
infatuation is so easy.
when you're a hopeless romantic.
or maybe just hopeless.

ghost trails2

take a picture.
every day everyone moves so fast.
we don't stop anymore.
all we have are pictures.
to capture moments.
it's too bad we're all too fast.
all we are, are ghost trails.
flashes that used to be human.
except for me that is.
my life is an epic standstill.
a beautiful standstill.
take a picture.
i am no ghost trail.

The wind gently moves the locks of hair on my forehead
as I stare out across the water
the busy skyline of the city reflecting off of the bright sun
it's rays shimmering across the green water
I sit patiently on this cracked piece of slate
as the world goes through the motions around me
I sit and wait patiently
as planes fly overhead
people walk their black dogs
and drive their cars
talk on their cell phones
mediating with the world
with life
they continue to move around me
I wait to
slip into the water
and let the beautiful green engulf me
as I relinquish my life to it
let it fill my lungs and course my veins
for I mediate with you death, my old friend.

What if I'm making a mistake?

http://xkcd.com/

Zeros and Ones

I have stood at the top of our never ending networks.
Our cross linked mass storage and super powered systems.
Our glowing screens and flickering cursors.
We are all just zeros and ones, floating in this domain.
And my digital self moves much faster than most.
Our clicking keys interface us with this world.
This world of On and Off.
Not maybe, possibly, perhaps or probably.
Just On and Off.
If only this world was so simple, I would move just as fast here.

Nothing at all.

I drive the streets a night
Long after most have fallen asleep
I drive in a post apocalyptic world
Where no one remains but myself
I listen to my music
The only relic my great civilization left behind
But I'm not nostalgic for the days of crowded sidewalks
Or busy streets
This infinite loneliness is fulfilling
It is amazing beyond all imagination
To have hope for nothing at all
To have hope for nothing at all.